little steps in between

Today I lost a bet. Apparently winningest is a real word. Who knew? Well, the mister did. Hence me losing. In other news, I visited my best friend today and her new baby girl. Newborns are so tiny!

This blogging every day is tougher than I thought...I'm running out of ammo. I could write about dinner; pork roast with mashed potatoes or the weather: cold and cloudy. I could get a little more personal and write about how I haven't talked to my mom in over a week and our relationship is feeling weird again. But I won't write about that. Instead, I'll tell you that I'm working to stay grateful for every moment. I'll write about how when I was little I would dream of what my life would be like when I was older and I'm fortunate that I'm living that dream. Okay, I'm not a Hollywood celebrity but the other dream, the one of having a husband who adores me and a quaint little house full of life...that dream it's mine.

Here's the problem with dreaming though, I haven't stopped. I don't know that that is a huge problem but sometimes it keeps me from enjoying what's here right in front of me. I start thinking about how I wish I had something fabulous to share, an outrageous idea, a beautiful project, a great story or adventure and I'm whisked away from all of the beauty that is my life right now. My life - mundane, safe and full of the mess of living. When I stop long enough to really be present and put the dreaming aside for a moment I can experience all of the fullness of it. A belly full from a rich dinner, the mister on the rug (that the cat peed on again) playing with the little boy.

My little boy who is learning to walk gets so much forward momentum his weight teeters him over, his head leading, his little legs can't keep up and he falls onto his hands. I live much of my life this way, thinking, worrying and dreaming of the future, moving too fast forward to appreciate all of the little steps in between now and then. I'm going to work to move slower, appreciate all of the steps and nuance... I bet I'll have more to share then too.

*On a post post note: Blogger's spellcheck does not recognize the word winningest! Hah! ... It apparently doesn't recognize the word Blogger either though...