tapped out

So I bombed out of the NaBloPoMo for March but not all is lost. Actually, despite not following through on my commitment I've gotten a lot from attempting to blog every day. I've been really thinking about the purpose of blogging. Why do you blog?
I started this blog for a few reasons:
-to gain a sense of online community
-to help encourage me to write thoughtfully (opposed to my journal which is sometimes like attacking the page with whatever thoughts are in my head)
-a place to log daily thoughts and creative endeavors (haven't done much with the creative part yet)
-a place to consider and honor the ordinary and mundane personally and as a new mom

I'm not sure how I'm doing in these areas but I do know that blogging has really pushed me to think about my writer's voice and how I present things. Along the lines of presentation, I've also taken a look at perspective both in life and in writing. Perspective is so important - it really creates and informs how someone approaches a situation. I think I usually struggle with what perspective to take particularly in my writing.

In other news - great news! My blessed and beautiful laptop is back and in working order. I didn't lose any of the writing I had done and failed to back up. Whew! I am so grateful it's here and I still have my files!

So blogworld, I'm gonna pick up where I left off and finish out March. I'll be back at it tomorrow.

Mother In Law

She's in town, staying with us for the weekend - more from me later!
The gist of it: she loves being a grandma, she loves our little boy, she's a great help around the house and she shared some really interesting stuff with me today - lots of insight into hubby's family dynamics.

strike when the iron is hot

I've recently decided I need to try to make this blog more interesting to read. I hate to admit it but really, I've just been plopping down at the end of the day and throwing whatever random thoughts I have out there. Okay, so my inner censor pretty much talks me out of most of it and I come up with pretty mediocre posts. Hence my decision, to try a little harder to entertain you dear reader. And also I think I may enjoy it more. I thought I had an interesting anecdote this morning I even made a little note in my journal: Blog idea - tell story of B. trying to eat his play mat. There was a really cute dialog around it with me and the mister even. But alas, that was hours ago and a whole day has passed: work, dinner, good conversation - a really good day - all at the cost of that interesting tidbit about the boy eating his play mat. Sigh...maybe tomorrow. Oh, well blogworld. The best of intentions - and all that.

a beautiful day

A fitful night of sleep. My little one, under the weather snuggled between the two of us - kicked and punched with tiny little fists all night long. We slept heavy in the morning and late. Then lunch at a posh restaurant with my wonderful aunt. New Mexican food - yum. Colorful walls and even more colorful artwork. Hours in the used bookstore that afternoon. My aunt looking for "just the perfect book". I found The Sound of Paper and instantly curled up in a chair to read with the boy who nodded off for a nap. We left with books in tow and parted with my aunt. My boy and I curled up to read our new finds. Then I simply vegged out in front of the tube until the mister returned.

The days still feel long and aimless. I still struggle with feeling like I don't do enough. Laundry piles up. I promise I'll clean this or finish that, then the boy cries inconsolably. We are finding our way slowly through the long hours of daylight, finding a balance between doing and being. I tell myself all day long "it's okay, it's enough, this too shall pass, one day you'll look back and miss these long hours of sitting". It makes it so much easier when I'm able to get out of the house. It's even more wonderful when I get to share my days with my boy and the company of loved ones.

An extra hour of sunlight and I remind myself that everything is happening exactly as it should be.

Day 10

Almost all better now but my head is still in a fog.

New lesson of parenting: take nothing for granted. My wee-one was a good sleeper, drifting off by the time me and the mister settled into bed but now... I'm not sure what to say about now, there's a whole parade and song and dance done in the interest of coaxing the little boy into slumber and it usually doesn't work.

I promise little one the world will still be here when you wake up.

I really struggled on this one

I got nothin'. Really. I've been sitting here for a few minutes now....


a few more minutes....


nothing.

Oh, okay...just went back to my list of lists post #9 Quirky habits I wish I had.

I wish I:

• smoked a tobacco pipe (and that it wasn't bad for my health)
• woke up occasionally in the middle of the night to eat cereal and write prolifically
• intermittently used exotic foreign words
• liked to drink martinis (then I could say "shaken not stirred")
• was brave enough to wear feather boas in public and pull it off
• ditto with fake eye lashes
• and a tiara
• had a secret career as a drag queen performer
• had an affinity for word puzzles

Yep, that's all folks!
for now anyhow.

Whisper to a Scream

Hey All! Guess who's feeling better? Okay, I'm not quite 100% but any increase in vitality at this point feels like a huge step forward. I can't breath through my nose but thank goodness, I can talk! (shrugs and sighs all around from those who know me - yeesh)

So since being under the weather, I have also been struggling with sleep. I'm not sure if it is the lack of sleep or lack of clear thinking due to congestion but something strange happens to me under these conditions: crazy thoughts at three in the morning and horrific songs stuck in my head - songs I swear I haven't heard in years! What's the deal here?

Last night at 3 am I was thinking about Doogie Howser - remember him? I was thinking about blogging and how dear Doogie seemed so clear and endearing in his thoughts on that cute little computer. How can I be more like Doogie Howser? Medical prodigy and have something sensible to say at the end of the day...something that summarizes everything so well and shows the world I've learned something and grown as a person today. Maybe someone can come up with a guide or something. Hey I know, a list!

Things I learned from Doogie Howser:
1. how to suture a wound and look cute

Okay, that's all I have, maybe any of you who remember Doogie can help me out...or better yet: If today your life was a scene from a sitcom or show, what would it be? Today, for me, I'm thinking I'd fit right in on the scene of Dumb and Dumber.

Mock ... ye-ah!
Ing ... ye-ah!
Bird ... ye-ah!
Mock-ing - Bird
Yeah!

or...
Out with the bad, in with the good! Out with the bad, in with the good!

Wow! All that I can't even blame cough syrup or anything!

I never had a crush on him as a youngster- maybe it's a sign that I'm getting older but is this guy just a cutie or what? Seriously, how could you not want him as your doctor?

He's even got his own blog: http://doogiehowsermd.blogspot.com/
Who knew?
Much love to ya Bloggies!